An Eggy Christmas Carol - Chapter 2

It had been a really busy day. Eggenezer Scrooge was feeling the slightly uncomfortable but strangely pleasant muscular ache that meant a thoroughly skillful workout had been had. She took a deep breath as well as hastily emptied the 'bag of contamination', tipping out sodden socks, muck-covered trainers, festering swim kit, a arrive at of bottles containing dregs of carb as well as electrolyte drinks as well as a collection of nutrient wrappers. She shiftily screwed upwards the testify of bundle of Tesco Finest Triple Chocolate Cookies as well as shoved it inward the bin underneath the salad bags hence she could pretend she had never eaten them.



Scrooge was tired but she couldn’t larn to sleep. Every fourth dimension she turned over she discovered a novel chip of her torso that was sore amongst fatigue. Her remove heed whirred every bit she idea well-nigh the adjacent day; when would she eat, what treats would her component buddies convey in, would she endure able to resist said treats?! How could she perhaps jibe inward all the Christmas shopping some her preparation excogitation for the day, maybe it would endure best simply to forget well-nigh the shopping as well as create a few extra bicep sets instead? Yes, that would do.. as well as a bonus twenty infinitesimal ab workout.. ooh.. as well as she could come across if at that spot was a terminal infinitesimal infinite available inward the spinning shape too! With that pleasing thought, physical as well as mental exhaustion took over as well as Scrooge sunk into a deep sleep.

The mutual frigidity of the nighttime descended as well as Scrooge awoke simply a few hours after to a gentle tapping on her window. She pulled dorsum the mantle simply an inch as well as peered outside. There, inward the road, was her quondam blueish Giant hybrid amongst its big bar extensions as well as oversized saddle. The pedal cranks were turning as well as the wheels were spinning, flicking freshly fallen snowfall inward every direction. Scrooge grabbed her dressing gown as well as ran downstairs; she swung the front end door opened upwards as well as nearly went caput over heels every bit the cycle had manoeuvred itself correct inward front end of her.

“Scrooge, I am the cycle of Christmases past, I’m hither to remind you lot what life used to endure similar earlier you lot took upwards triathlon as well as became a gym junkie.”
“Why on public would I desire to come across that?” Scrooge said grumpily, “I know what life used to endure like. I was an unfit, lazy, boozing chubster, I’m glad those times are inward the past!”
“Trust me Scrooge, you lot quest to come across what I accept to exhibit you. I’ve never permit you lot downwards earlier accept I? Not similar these novel fangled bikes amongst their skinny wheels as well as posh gear shifters.. you lot solely had me serviced in i trial inward all of our fourth dimension together as well as I never broke or punctured or caused you lot an injury!”
“Okay, okay, I’ll go amongst you”, Scrooge mumbled reluctantly, “but I desire to endure dorsum inward bed soon. You’re messing amongst my routine as well as if I can’t bang out unmarried arm swings on that 16kg kettlebell tomorrow because I’m overtired, I volition non endure happy!”

Scrooge hopped on the cycle as well as wondered briefly how it was she had never managed to selection upwards an injury riding inward this absolutely atrocious seat amongst her knees some her ears. They rode off into the past, a fourth dimension where practise was defined every bit a post-Sunday roast walk inward the province as well as an hr inward the gym would endure plenty to tide you lot over for the whole month.

They seemed to ride forever, travelling through many a past times December. Memories came flooding dorsum every bit Scrooge saw job solid unit of measurement Christmases amongst nutrient as well as drinkable a-plenty. Back then, nobody cared how many calories they consumed or if they pose on a few extra pounds over the festive season. Joyous times were spent laughing, playing games as well as beingness really amused at who was the drunkest. There was no choosing betwixt celebrating as well as exercising, celebrating was simply the done thing, as well as done good it was. Everybody made resolutions to “get fit” as well as “lose weight”, but actually they were pretty happy as well as content simply every bit they were.

Even inward to a greater extent than recent years when Scrooge had go a chip fitter, she saw Nepalese mount adventures, bouts of snowy British hillwalking, long days of skiing as well as snowboarding as well as the death-defying Alpine toboggan run. All of these fun, outdoorsy activities were swiftly followed past times sociable evenings inward the pub, filling upwards on hearty nutrient as well as enjoying (a substantial amount of) the local tipple earlier dancing on the tables until the early on hours.

“See Scrooge?” The cycle said, “It wasn’t so bad dorsum then. You were active, you lot had fun, job solid unit of measurement as well as friends came first... you lot weren’t e'er thinking well-nigh your adjacent practise fix, you lot simply went off as well as did dissimilar things as well as enjoyed life! Granted yes, you lot were a chip of a drunkard as well as you lot could likely accept done amongst less of the coming inward trashed at 4am as well as eating entire egg mayonnaise filled baguettes, but inward general, you lot worked difficult as well as played difficult as well as that is alright!”

“If I had lived similar that forever I wouldn’t accept a liver left!” Scrooge ranted, “I couldn’t accept fifty-fifty run a mile then, skiing as well as snowboarding were tardily plenty because all that extra weight got me downwards the mount prissy as well as fast. Look where the partying as well as socialising as well as lack of practise got me? Nowhere! Now I desire to go dorsum to bed, I’ve seen plenty of this.”

They rode dorsum whilst Scrooge continued to rant as well as rave well-nigh how unhealthy life used to be. As they arrived, Scrooge winced every bit she saw the bent as well as contorted remains of her really honey as well as lately departed quondam route bike, Bianca.

“Welcome dorsum to the acquaint fourth dimension Scrooge”, she whispered amongst her silky, sultry tones, “I’ve come upwards dorsum from wheel sky to assist you lot come across the mistake of your ways”.

To endure continued...

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